Ever since Mitch and I got married (and even before), people have been asking us when we're going to have babies...not if...when.
This can get very frustrating for 4 major reasons:
1) People assume you are going to have children
2) People assume it's their business to know when you are planning on having children
3) No matter how you answer the question, the person who asks it always has an opinion on your response
4) In essence, people are asking you about your sex life, and that's just none of heir beeswax!
That aside, I do LOVE babies, and all children as a whole...but this leads me to my post title.
Babies, to me, are like white pants. On a somewhat superficial level they share many of the same qualitites.
I will outline a few things I feel they have in common:
- Both get dirty quickly
- Both can be scary
- Both have the ability to make or break relationships
- Both may cause you to look larger than you actually are
- Both shouldn't be seen after Labour Day....no wait...scratch that...
But, I'm in no real hurry, and the thought of being responsible for a tiny person, full-time, 24/7/365 terrifies me...in the same way that white pants do. A good, clean, crisp pair of white pants with a carefully chosen top and accessories can be phenomenal. However, more often than not, wearing white slacks will turn into wardrobe hell. There are so many things that can go amuck when attempting to pull of the white trouser, whether it be made of linen, luon (like mine), cotton, denim, or polyester (do not attempt post 1977).
Secondly, they're white, so you're basically giving the universe "the bird" and daring it to come find you with all its' dirt, oil, grime, coffee and pasta sauce.
Thirdly, you must ensure that you are wearing the proper undergarments. I don't know how many times I've seen people wear white pants with hot pink polka dot, full bum underwear. Srsly??! Why not wear them on the outside of your clothes then?! Because that's how crystal clear I can see your gitch.
Babies....are adorable...unless you have an ugly baby...
Steve Lynch--Ugly Baby
And they do get dirty, and cry, and require speciality apparel and gear.
They keep you up at night, wake up early, smear quasi-disintegrated baby teething cookies all over you...
Who wouldn't want that right?
But when they are clean, nothing beats a lungful of that fresh baby smell...
I'm fortunate enough to have many many friends with young children, so I get my fill. And they seem like a lot of fun...but also, a lot of work...and right now, I'm amazed if I can get through my work day, find time for a work out and make a meal or two...So...to recap...no babies here for a while (so stop asking) white pants...perhaps if the right ones come along...
OMG. This made me LOL.
ReplyDeleteSeriously, though, Pam, this is blogging gold. And very you. I love you, sis.
I have white capri pants, and I remember being very upset with Jody when he heedlessly tossed me around at the park and they got grass stained... thank goodness for Tide To Go! It's not so easy to care for a baby. And you can't put one in your drawer after labour day. There - that's how babies are not like white pants :)
you are awesome, pammy. people are always on the rush for babies - but you're still young!!! and i know, too, you'll be a great mom whenever that happens and to whoever you mother!!
ReplyDelete